Sh!t French Parents Say

“If you keep making that face, it’s going to get stuck like that.”

“God gave you two legs for a reason. Use ’em.”

“Were you raised in a barn?”

“Because I said so.”

We’ve all heard these, or some variation of them. Maybe we heard them growing up. Maybe we’ve said them to our own children. Either way, they’re pretty common phrases that American parents say to their kids.

I recently started learning French on the DuoLingo app (which I highly recommend; it’s FREE) and it got me wondering.

What do French parents say to their kids?

Here are a few phrases I found that I’m definitely going to start using:

(Note: DuoLingo didn’t teach me these. Google did.)


1. “Des cailloux.”

Use when: the kiddos ask “what’s for dinner?”

Translation: “Pebbles.”


2. “Mange ta main et garde l’autre pour demain.”

Use when: they’re whining because dinner isn’t ready yet.

Translation: “Eat your hand and save the other for tomorrow.”


3. “Et ton père, il est vitrier?”

Use when: they stand directly between you and the tv, effectively blocking your view.

Translation: “Is your father a glazier?” (someone who cuts and installs glass)


4. “Et mon cul c’est du poulet.”

Use when: you catch them in a lie.

Translation: “And my ass is made of chicken.”


And finally, my personal favorite:

5. “Continue et pleure, tu pisseras moins.”

Use when: they’re throwing a tantrum. So, in other words, daily.

Translation: “Keep crying, you’ll piss less.”


Did I mention that I love the French? Because I do. So sassy.

Which phrase is your favorite? Let me know in the comments!



5 thoughts on “Sh!t French Parents Say

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